Vered’s Story: Chapter 6

My next major milestone was celebrating my bas mitzvah. This is a special event in the life of every Jewish girl. As a giyores who converted before I was a bas mitzvah, it was an even more  significant occasion: it was the moment I would decide if I wanted to continue being Jewish… or not.

I was nervous because I thought that I had to formally announce my commitment to Yiddishkeit. But actually, someone who was megayer as a child remains Jewish at his or her bar or bas mitzvah without any special procedure or announcement, unless they purposely commit an act that is against halachah to show that they’ve chosen not to be Jewish. But if they choose to stay Jewish, they don’t do anything special or make any formal declaration — just continuing to keep the Torah and mitzvos is the declaration.

I would have been calmer if I’d known that! I thought I needed to state: I want to remain Jewish. Maybe I even thought I needed to do that in front of other people. I wasn’t nervous about remaining Jewish, just nervous about declaring it in a public setting!

My parents planned a big party and they wanted me to speak. The thought of getting up and speaking publicly about my commitment to Judaism made me very nervous. The actual decision, whether or not to remain Jewish, wasn’t much of a question. I loved our community, I loved the people, and I loved the learning. Our community was filled with people so kind, welcoming and warm, and I knew that they were that way because of the Torah, our ultimate guidebook on how to be good people. It really was clear to me: I’d learned about all the mitzvos that demand that we stretch ourselves to be kind, to think of what others need, mitzvos like leket, peah, tzedakah, chesed, being kind to orphans, widows, and converts… It was like the ideal program on how to become the best kind of person you can be.