Appreciation

On Succos we sit in our succah and contemplate Hashem’s tremendous kindness to us. He has allowed us to reach this season. He has blessed us with His protective shelter. He has sustained us with His bountiful harvest. Thank You Hashem! Without Your moment-by-moment intervention we would not survive let alone prosper. You are the source of all of our blessings and we so appreciate everything You do for us! Thank You. 

Becoming Appreciative

If only humans were naturally appreciative. In reality people tend to become appreciative in one of two main ways: through being taught or by being deprived. Let’s look at the second way first. Deprivation and its suffering are painful experiences. Not having hot water or food or money — in fact not having any of the “normal” comforts of modern life — causes people to particularly enjoy them when they are next experienced and sometimes forever more. For instance even after a temporary power shortage people can become permanently appreciative of the “normal” flow of electricity into their worlds. The larger the deprivation the greater the subsequent appreciation is likely to be: temporarily losing the use of one’s limb for example can cause a life-long appreciation for every little movement ever made once the use of the limb is restored. While deprivation is a potent teacher of appreciation we tend to prefer more benign lessons in character development. Fortunately we usually have willing teachers to instruct us in the art and skill of developing the middah of appreciation. Spouses and parents are happy to step in.

Teaching Appreciation Within the Family

Many families are plagued by a lack of appreciation. “I feel taken-for-granted as if everything I do is just expected” both husbands and wives complain.

“Every night I make a great meal and all I get is a grunt in acknowledgement. It takes me hours to shop for and prepare everything. I’d like the response to be a lot more enthusiastic!”