“Let’s be realistic about the burden, and then we can say we are happy to take it”
I laughed when I saw the poll about whose minhagim you follow, your mother’s or your mother-in-law’s. I still remember what my kallah teacher told me before I got married: “Always remember, the most important minhag of all is shalom bayis.” I recite that to myself like a mantra each year, as I watch my husband obliviously eat his matzah, dropping crumbs freely all over my Pesach dishes. And I keep reciting it, through teeth that grow progressively more gritted, until at some point I snap and say, “No crumbs on the silverware! Gebrochts!” My kids think I’m nuts and I think they’re all committing terrible gebrochts crimes.
The good news is, over the years I’ve managed to work on my middos enough so that each year I snap later and later on Yom Tov. My hope is that for our 50th anniversary, I won’t even complain when my husband puts scrambled eggs on his matzah.
Name Withheld
This was a beautiful and heartwarming feature, and I really enjoyed the read. But it did feel like it was glossing over the fact that having grandparents living in the house almost always comes with challenges and sacrifice. All the families who were interviewed made it seem like the experience was always wonderful and positive. That’s not the case for anyone I know who lived with such an arrangement. Sure, most times the positive outweighs the negative, but let’s be realistic about the burden, and then we can say we are happy to take it.
Anonymous
Thank you, Emuna Stein, and your husband and children, for all your love, dedication, and sacrifice.
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