"The real way to combat your privilege is by apologizing for it in every possible context"
So you want to join the conversation, impress others as politically aware, be a modern-day Renaissance man— er, we mean, person who respectfully admires but does not appropriate or attempt to imitate other cultures? Look no further than this guide to impressing others with your shallow pseudointellectualism, regardless of where they fall on the political spectrum.
Want to look woke? It’s all about the apologies — recognize that whoever you’ve become, whatever you’ve achieved, it’s all due to your privilege. The house you bought? Privilege. The job you have? Privilege. The shalach manos with matching themed costume? I have never heard of anything so privileged in my life.
Luckily, there’s an easy way out of this — donate substantial percentages of your income to charities servicing underprivileged populations. HAHAHA. We kid. The real way to combat your privilege is by apologizing for it in every possible context.
“Hey, dude, I really wish I could volunteer at your soup kitchen, but I’ll be off in Bora Bora next week. I fully realize that I’m only able to do this because of my in-laws’ oppression of indigenous peoples, though. Sorry about that.”
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