Laundry Wars

As a newlywed millennial, I viewed the washing machine like a microwave, computer, or any other electronic device — press a button and voilà! Or, in this case, put the clothes in, turn the dial, and then press a button. An hour later, the clothes are clean, but wet. But not to worry — that’s a solvable problem! Throw them in the next machine and press a button. Within an hour, the clothes are clean and dry. Success! Or so I thought.

After a few weeks of marriage, my husband approached me. “You know, my grandmother lives nearby and she’s bored during the day. Maybe she could do our laundry?” I knew that I wasn’t necessarily talented at doing laundry, but the clothes were technically clean — and that was good enough for me. Grandma would not be doing our laundry, I told my husband.

Fast forward a few years. As my children graduated from wearing onesies 24/7 to normal clothes (that were, in theory, supposed to last a whole year), I soon realized that asking Grandma for a few pointers might have been a good idea, after all. My clothing situation was truly a mess — the whites were gray and spotted, the dark colored sweaters were fading and had little fuzzy balls everywhere, and the brand-new outfits lasted only a few washes before becoming dingy and a few sizes smaller.

Before we ran out of clothes entirely, I decided it was time to tackle my laundry problem once and for all. The first step was getting a proper education from women who had truly mastered the art of laundry.