Much Ado About Stuff

In our age of plenty, it seems as if our kids just want more and more. How do we raise emotionally healthy, happy kids without giving in to the endless desires for stuff? Where does the desire come from–and what can we do about it?

Ayala, 40, Chicago

Chaya, 35, LA

Miri, 38, Flatbush

Leah, 42, Beitar

Raizy, 33, Lakewood

Elisheva, 45, Yerushalayim

Ayala

Everyone’s always saying how if it were up to them, they wouldn’t go for all the materialism around them, but there’s just so much pressure… from the parents in the class, from the mechutanim, from the other side, always the other side.

I want to hear from the other side. Where is the other side? I want to hear from people who buy $180 stretchies for their babies. I want to hear why they do that.

Chaya

They’re also pressured.

Leah

I’d like to hear about their pressure. Where is it coming from?

Chaya

Every circle has pressure. There’s always going to be someone with a leg up.

Raizy

No one is going to admit that they are creating the pressure. They’re going to tell you that they have to do it. They don’t have a choice. I read a really interesting piece recently about billionaire pressure. Their pressure is like, whose plane is outfitted and in which way? Apparently, there are light switches that cost hundreds of dollars that no one would notice is any different from a simple light switch, but they’re pressured to have it.

Ayala

You’re touching on something, Raizy. I have this theory that you don’t have peer pressure from people outside of your social group. So I’m never going to be in competition with billionaires, but I’ll feel super competitive with the people who have a similar lifestyle to mine.