Parshas Chayei Sarah: 5786

“…Avraham came to eulogize Sarah and to weep for her.” (Bereishis 23:2)

In Mishlei (21:21) it says, “One who pursues righteousness and chesed will find life, righteousness and honor.” The Midrash suggests this refers to Avraham Avinu who pursued chesed when he buried his wife.

Avraham was the epitome of chesed, but any man who lost his wife would certainly bury her. Why focus on this act to demonstrate that Avraham pursued chesed? (Rabbi Shlomo Caplan, Mishulchan Shlomo)

You gotta meet my friend Rina*. She’s an astoundingly talented person who runs performances across the globe. She works months on each of these performances, but doesn’t take a penny. Instead, the profits go to tzedakah.

I have another friend, Sara,* who cooks every day for families in need. She stands for hours in her kitchen and never gets a thank-you from any recipient, because the entire endeavor is anonymous.

Then there’s Shira,* who battles Israeli traffic several times a week to drive cancer patients to and from hospitals. I was so impressed with this initiative that I volunteered as well. I think I managed to drive someone twice. It just never worked with my schedule.

Rav Sholom Schwadron suggests that pursuing chesed refers to the middah of chesed — an attitude — rather than an action. Chesed doesn’t merely refer to the act of rendering assistance; rather it’s the passion for chesed – ahavas chesed. We see this in Avraham as well, who wanted guests although the heat suggested there were no travelers outside. He was driven by his passion for chesed, not because he saw someone in need. Even burying Sarah, something he was expected to do, was performed by Avraham with the passion for gemilus chasadim.

I’m not the chesed type. I don’t have time for hours of play rehearsals. I have a hard enough time getting dinner on the table for my own family; forget about for others. I just can’t seem to fit chesed into my lifestyle. And that makes me sad. Because there are so many people and so many needs, and somehow, I only manage my own.