Still Here 

Saying Shema with them, I noticed my hands shaking slightly and my heart beating faster than usual. Hamalach, Adon Olam, and of course — I love you, Princess. I love you, Munchkin. Sweet dreams!

I lay in my daughters’ room as the questions around me slowed and blurred and were replaced by soft, slow breathing… and hyperventilated.

Ima said I love you. Ima. Said. I love you. She said it!

I dreamed of Ima telling me she loved me for so, so long. And now it made me feel… nothing. Weird. Like I had been waiting all my life for shooting stars only to learn that what I could see had fizzled out millions of light-years away.