Too often, I see parents and teachers “pushing” those in their care instead of supporting them
So it was with interest and admiration that I watched the gabbai in one recent minyan. He deftly navigated the shul, finding volunteers, doling out honors, receiving rejections and thanks. Finally, he needed to give out hagba’ah. This can be a particularly challenging kibbud to assign, due to all the variables one has to consider: How heavy is the Torah? How strong is the person being asked? And are we in a parshah that favors left-handed or right-handed people?
There is also a certain technique to performing hagba’ah successfully. If the sefer Torah is at all heavy, you have to know how to pull it toward you off the bimah before tilting and lifting with your legs (never with your wrists), while simultaneously opening the scroll a bit and twisting your body so all present can focus for a moment on the written letters, all while preparing to step backward to the chair that has hopefully been arranged for you. Then you sit holding the Torah upright so it can be dressed by the one honored with gelilah.
In a word, hagba’ah can be intimidating. I have seen high-powered business executives who spend their days in incredibly pressured environments, surgeons who save lives with unparalleled precision, athletes who could sink a three-pointer or stare down a 90-mile-an-hour fastball, talmidei chachamim who can recite Shas forward and backward, and baalei tefillah who have brought crowds to tears during Ne’ilah on Yom Kippur, all turn down the chance to do hagba’ah when offered by a harried gabbai.
At this minyan, the gabbai offered hagba’ah to young man in his mid-teens. He politely declined the honor with the simple and persuasive argument, “I don’t know how.”
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