As they age, many parents become impatient, short-tempered, and/or cantankerous. When this happens, it poses serious challenges for their adult children
Reena (not her real name) was a high-functioning, 20-something mother of three when she first consulted me a few years ago. I had successfully helped her husband over a bout of depression in the past, and Reena was hoping I could assist her now, too.
“It’s my relationship with my mother,” she explained, wasting no time in getting straight to the reason for her visit. “She’s driving me crazy and I just can’t take it anymore.”
With stress written all over her face, she poured out the details of the history of her conflict-ridden relationship with her mother.
As the oldest daughter, Reena had initially enjoyed an almost privileged status with her mother, who would never go shopping without bringing Reena along as a fashion advisor. Her mother was so attached to Reena that it often made her feel uncomfortable. When Reena married, however, all of that suddenly changed. Almost overnight, Reena became the black sheep in her mother’s eyes. In the six years since Reena had married, her mother had not visited her even once, despite the fact that she lived only a few blocks away.
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