“No one else can help me. You’re the only One who can give me children and a healthy pregnancy”,
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Our wedding memories were three weeks fresh. I set up our own menorah in our own apartment with its bare white walls unstained carpet. The smiles on our faces were still timid as we lit a single candle. The glow from the candle the newness and the excitement encapsulated the moment before it became lost in the sea of eternity.
“And by next Chanukah we’ll probably have a baby” I told my husband with a dreamy sigh. Everything was so perfect why shouldn’t it continue to be so?
I guess life’s definition of perfection didn’t match my own.
I sat by the menorah brokenhearted and confused. My husband and I said Tehillim together and I choked down my tears. After he left I stared deep into the flames trying to derive comfort and hope. Our second Chanukah. We’d had a baby.
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