“I Like My Job But Am Very Underpaid” 

I’ve been employed for the last ten years, at a total of five jobs, not all in the same industry. I actually like the work I’m doing now, but I’m not making ends meet and have been told by friends that I’m severely underpaid. My boss isn’t willing to pay more, despite the fact that my work has brought in new business and I’ve taken on extra responsibilities. I don’t have many people to ask career advice from — I’m an oldest, my father-in-law is in chinuch, and I lost my father when I was 11. I’m wondering if you can advise me — do I keep my job, look for another similar one, or something else altogether?

I’m glad you mentioned two points I often ask clients about: birth order and parents’ profession.

Strange as that may seem for a career consultant, they often provide valuable insight into dynamics we see playing out on the job. I’m going to make some generalized assumptions based on statistics, which may or may not be true for you. They do reflect prevalent dynamics, and I find recognizing these factors can be helpful.

Oldest children, even in adulthood, are more likely than others to naturally take on extra responsibilities, whether or not they are required to. They’re also likely to be people pleasers and perfectionists, and have strong leadership skills. Compared to their siblings, they often are higher earners.

In your case though, losing a father at such a pivotal age seems to have hijacked the typical eldest path. As you likely have thought about many times, losing your father affected so many parts of your life, including your career trajectory. Men often model their careers after their fathers, sometimes even going into the same profession.There is also the social loss, namely the ability to tap in to the parent’s professional network, which gives young people an easy entry into the workforce.