“I’ve been married for 20 years, and for most of that time, starting from when my oldest was about two years old, I, too, struggled with this”
As soon as I saw the cover of your magazine and read the sneak peek of the mom who was losing her temper at her kids, I knew I had to write in.
This is my story.
I’ve been married for 20 years, and for most of that time, starting from when my oldest was about two years old, I, too, struggled with this. I originally thought it was due to lack of sleep, or the fact that I grew up being hit by my parents. I tried giving myself incentives to work on this. I went to therapy, and still I found myself lashing out physically.
Things came to a head about four years ago when I found these episodes increasing. I was moody and angry at home a lot, annoyed at family members, and generally grouchy. I was finally diagnosed with postpartum depression (PPD), and, like the narrator of the story, I went on an SSRI. (Note to public: You don’t have to be crying in bed all day to have PPD. Mine manifested much more as anger and irritability.)
Since the day I started taking that medication, I haven’t had a single physical outburst at any child. I, too, used to wonder why I didn’t have the self-control to count to ten or deep breathe before losing it. It seems in retrospect that I simply had a chemical imbalance. I have no plans of going off the medication. I think it’s a fair trade for my husband and children to have a safe, happy, and healthy wife and Mommy.
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