Chazal teach us that two of the gates in the Beis HaMikdash that Shlomo HaMelech built were the Shaar Chassan and the Shaar Avel. The purpose of these gates was to afford Klal Yisrael the opportunity either to commiserate with the pain of another Jew who had lost a loved one or to share in the joy of chassan as he prepared for his great day of jubilation. By erecting those gates in a public place Shlomo HaMelech taught us an important lesson: A Jew should feel for others sharing in their moments of joy and moments of pain even if they are not related to him — and even if he doesn’t know them at all.
Since the destruction of the Beis HaMikdash this opportunity continues to manifest itself through a mikdash me’at a beis haknesses where we console a mourner on Friday evening on one hand and l’havdil share in the simchah of an aufruf prior to a chassan’s marriage.
With sefiras haOmer now behind us we have officially entered the chasunah season. For the next few weeks we might find every night on the calendar filled with at least one — if not two or three — wedding invitations.
Of course when inundated with simchahs it is extremely difficult to participate in every one. Nevertheless those of us who have made chasunahs all understand how difficult the task of planning a simchah can be and it is only fair that when invited as guests we take the burden off of the baalei simchah by making their task as easy as possible to complete.
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