One Friday night we hosted a young woman who was exploring Judaism. Intelligent and deep thinking she had lots of questions. The meal ended and my husband seeing that I was engrossed in conversation with our guests cleared the table and straightened up the kitchen.
After Shabbos one of my guest’s friends contacted me. “Natalie had a good time but it really bothered her that your husband sat at the head of the table while you served the meal. She has some feminist issues with that.”
This wasn’t the first time I’d heard this complaint so I wasn’t surprised. If Natalie had called me directly I’d have told her “I can see why you feel this seems unfair. But the truth is everyone does things that they don’t enjoy at times because of the roles that they fill.
“Imagine a young woman who gets a degree in social work in order to help improve people’s lives but then her job entails hours of paperwork. Or what about two inspired baalei teshuvah who marry and eagerly start a family yet are taken aback by the lack of inspiration in continuous rounds of diaper changes midnight feedings and bouts of colic?”
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