The tovas sechel of a woman gives her a different and wider perspective: a dish may be broken, but look at the bigger picture— see the beautiful children we are raising
A king should not have many wives, Chazal exhort, even if they are as great as Avigayil Haneviah. Avigayil Haneviah was one of the four most beautiful women in the world; Sarah Imeinu, Rachel Imeinu, and Esther Hamalkah being the other three. Not only was she externally beautiful, but she is described as tovas sechel, one who possessed deep inner understanding. Who was this special woman? What message does she offer us?
Avigayil Haneviah was married to a man of both prominence and great wealth, from the tribe of Yehudah. Naval, as his name suggests, was stingy, and cold-hearted. Dovid was on the run from Shaul, and was living in Midbar Yehudah. When he heard that Naval was making a great feast to mark the sheep shearing, he sent men to ask for some food as compensation for protecting Naval’s sheep. Naval responded with contempt, and he sent the men away empty-handed. In his anger, Dovid swore to destroy Naval’s household that very evening.
Upon hearing what had occurred, Avigayil prepared an abundance of food and drink, and she went to meet Dovid on his way to carrying out his threat. In her confrontation with the future king of Israel, we see the brilliance of Avigayil Haneviah, and witness her prophecy regarding Dovid’s reign.
The Ralbag holds up this meeting as a model of appeasement, and delineates the different approaches Avigayil utilized. First, she sends the food as a gift. Avigayil is aware that Dovid’s men are starving — and words will not appease hungry stomachs. Avigayil’s tovas sechel can serve as a model in our own daily interactions. Before attempting to convey a message, ensure that the recipient is ready to be a receptacle — physically and emotionally open to receiving that message.
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