Beyond Intolerance

At this time of year, we’re particularly aware of our relationships and particularly interested in fostering peace within them. We may also be acutely aware of just how challenging this can be. One of the biggest impediments to this is intolerance.

“When my husband uses a very firm tone of voice with me, I really can’t stand it. I find it obnoxious.”

This woman is experiencing intolerance. Intolerance is part cognition and part emotion. As this woman describes her husband’s behavior as “obnoxious,” she’s passing judgment. The other part of intolerance is an angry feeling. We can judge without being angry (as in, “I disapprove of people who talk with their mouths full of food”), but when we feel a surge of negative emotion filling our body as we pronounce the judgment (as in, “I can’t stand people who talk with their mouths full!”), we’ve moved into the realm of intolerance.

Intolerance Prevents Peace

Because of the sour emotion that accompanies our judgment, intolerance prevents wholesome feelings between people. And yet, we all harbor large doses of intolerance.