"Whether it’s a hobby, a volunteer activity, or a new job, we need to keep growing. Which will minimize inappropriately turning to our adult children to have our needs met"
I read your Lifetakes about the writer who met a woman caring for her husband with dementia, and how she admired her.
I have never been called a hero for taking care of my husband a”h who had dementia. We were married many years and have many grandchildren and great-grandchildren with whom he was zocheh to share the smachot as best he could.
We did have a caregiver for the last two and a half years of his life, but the entire responsibility was still mine. Dementia steals a person’s, life little by little, and all one can do is hope that Hashem will be meracheim. And He was.
When you live with someone who davened every day, who put on tefillin every day, who checked times for Shabbat and Yom Tov although he was unable to walk or go to shul, it is overwhelmingly sad to adjust to a new reality. Walking away or putting him in a facility was never even a fleeting thought.
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