Family Living: What My Doctor Told Me  

“If she can smile, she’s okay.”

I knew less than nothing about babies when I had my first. (I’m a youngest; I could have written a teenager’s manual about how to take care of grandparents but had rarely seen babies up close.) When my oldest baby had her first bad cold, I went along to our wonderful pediatrician in Sanhedria in Yerushalayim. He easily got the baby to smile at him, then explained that if she was smiling and responsive, it was clear she wasn’t seriously unwell. That has guided me through so many baby illnesses.

R.W.

“Six children is a lot. You have a lot going on. Don’t only look at women who are doing more than you.”

Run-down and overwhelmed. Dealing with anxious, panicky thoughts, and then with a virus that made me dizzy even when I lay in bed. Seven months after my sixth child was born, I was struggling and couldn’t recognize myself. My GP reframed my life and made it clear that I wasn’t struggling “just to function with the basics.” I had a demanding and active life that meant I had to take care of myself properly.

P.G.

“When your child is hungry, they will ask for food.”

Once, when I was complaining to my doctor that my daughter wasn’t eating properly, he told me the following: “Bamba is also a food. Don’t worry, when she’s hungry she’ll let you know. It might be during bedtime, which you won’t like, but she’ll ask, so don’t force-feed her.” I’ve calmed myself with that many times over the years. When a child is genuinely hungry, they will instinctively ask for food.

L.M.

“You shouldn’t be going to the bris! You need to have energy for the rest of them!”

I was an oldest, raised in a very close-knit, old-style community. I remember walking along the street to my firstborn’s bris, when we met our frum family doctor. “Where are you going?” he asked me.