"I think it’s terribly unhealthy for them to get a message that they should be deprived or seen as misfits because their father is learning"
I enjoyed the vivid mashal painted by the “Mashgiach in Yerushalayim” who wrote to the Inbox last week, explaining that kollel couples make a choice to live with less gashmiyus as an investment that will yield greater returns down the line. As someone who is fortunate enough to belong to the kollel demographic, this was a good reminder why I shouldn’t feel deprived even though my wardrobe, sheitel, shoes, home, etc., are not the latest look, to put it mildly.
But I fail to see how this mashal applies to the Double Take story about a mother shopping for her teens. My children did not make the decision to forgo gashmiyus for their father’s learning. One day they’ll make their choice, but right now they have the same social desires and need to fit in that every child their age experiences.
I don’t think that my teenage daughters have to wear last season’s clothing because of a choice I made. I don’t think it’s reasonable to expect that they show up to school events with the “wrong” coat, backpack, or shoes. I think it’s terribly unhealthy for them to get a message that they should be deprived or seen as misfits because their father is learning.
Yes, I am an adult who has made a conscious decision to live on a lower standard, but they are not adults yet, nor have they made any choices here.
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