Is Yente the Matchmaker No Longer Enough?  

These days, there’s a societal trend to hire a “dating mentor” during the shidduch process. Some opine that they’re indispensable to healthy dating and long overdue in the field. Others say they’re a crutch (an expensive one) who cripple your intuition and complicate matters unnecessarily. A look at the new player on the shidduch scene

Tevye & Golda are floating. Yente the matchmaker just called — she has a shidduch suggestion for their daughter, Tzeitel. A good boy, a smart boy, a rich boy. Their restrained cries of joy are interrupted by loud knocking on the front door.

“Mazel tov! I heard the good news!” It’s the nosy neighbor next door. “Such a fine boy for your sweet Tzeitel, but of course. So, nu, which ‘dating mentor’ are you going to hire?”

Wait, whaaat? A dating mentor??

Since days of old, the shadchan has been the main player in shidduchim. But these days, more and more singles — and their parents — are bringing another party into the picture: a dating mentor (or dating coach).

Is Yente no longer enough?

For the uninitiated, a dating mentor is someone who’s hired to counsel the single (or his/her parents, or both) through the highs, lows, and question marks of the dating stage. It’s an objective mentor the girl or boy is checking in with either after each date, or on an as-needed basis, as issues crop up.