It’s not if you fight, it’s how you fight
You’ve heard it before, but it bears repeating: It’s not if you fight, it’s how you fight.
Marriage joins two people with different personalities, processing, and communication styles, childhood influences and experiences — and disagreements are inevitable. Accordingly, equipping yourself with knowledge about the best and healthiest ways to disagree is a smart investment in marriage.
Sometimes though, a difficult disagreement is compounded by other aggravating factors (think tiredness, hormonal overdrive, stress at work or at home, etc.) and can lead to emotional flooding and overdrive. This can happen without much warning and can feel very overwhelming.
Imagine the following scenario:
Shimmy: “I can’t believe your brother didn’t come tonight! Everyone else had to change their schedules to show up for your parents’ anniversary dinner, but Reuven, the golden boy, gets to just skip? Niiice….”
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