I don'tmind talking about my parents, but it doesn’t mean I’m an entertainment center if you’re curious or bored
I don’t mind talking about my parents, but it doesn’t mean I’m an entertainment center if you’re curious or bored. Please understand that you’ve got to be close to me to ask personal questions! Imagine if we’re all sitting around schmoozing, and I asked you if your parents have a lot of disagreements — would you think that was appropriate? For some reason we become an address for questions, comments, and even other people’s divorce stories. Or, the opposite might happen: Someone will say the “D” word and then suddenly get all weirded out ’cuz I’m sitting there, and the other girls will give her nasty looks and kicks. You’re allowed to say the word divorce in front of me!
Please don’t pity us, but more importantly, please don’t start judging us! We are not our parents, and our parents are not us; our parents not living in the same home anymore doesn’t make us different than other teenagers, other than the fact that we were chosen for this challenge, while you were chosen for different challenges. Other people may be able to hide their challenges if they so choose but we don’t really get that option.
In a way, there is something different about us — something good. Like others who have gone through a major and drastic life change, it can make us more flexible to accept other challenging situations. We need to adapt on a constant basis, and we also often have to use diplomatic skills. Many of us become super sensitive to people’s feelings because of our own experiences.
For starters, divorce is not a disease, it’s not shameful, and it doesn’t mean that anything is wrong with us — or our parents! When someone’s parents divorce it doesn’t automatically mean that one of them is not okay or that something major “happened”; it simply means that they are like two puzzle pieces that don’t match. One piece is not better than the other, they just don’t fit together.
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