"Not every marriage problem originates with mental illness. Not every relationship issue has its roots in childhood trauma. Not every struggling marriage requires therapy"
I read “Hear My Cry,” about a girl in shidduchim “who’s as single as they come, with no dates in the cards,” with tears pooling in my own eyes.
You see, I was reading about me. There I am, in all those tears, the pain and hopelessness after so many years of dating. I married late, and it was over within a few brief months, sending me back into the endless world of waiting. I, too, have watched friends, relatives and younger siblings marry and start families. I too have davened for so long, feeling lost, searching for something to hold on to.
It is a silent, burning suffering, unfathomable in its depth and loneliness. What do you say to someone like me, who has tried every segulah, heard every type of chizuk, every good wish, every “it will come” and “you’ll get married” and “Hashem has a plan”? How many times have I wondered and feared that perhaps marriage is simply not part of my plan? Will I have enough years to start a family? What thought, then, should I hold on to, when all hopeful thoughts have run dry through the relentless passage of time?
May the yeshuah come, finally, for me and my sisters in Klal Yisrael, waiting for so long. Don’t forget about us… and may our piercing cries finally be answered.
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