Going for the Gold

H e wanted one. And I wanted him not to want one.

It’s gold and round and expensive — and useless. So my brothers said. My two older brothers whose opinions I revered told their kallahs — begged their kallahs — not to buy them an overpriced unnecessary pointless wear-it-to-only-to-your-wedding-and-sheva-brachos gold chassan watch.

Neither of my brothers’ kallahs paid attention and both my brothers received a watch. But their younger sister did pay attention. I soaked in every syllable of their logical fiscally responsible arguments delivered at the soapbox of our kitchen table.

“Why would a young man want a thousand-dollar item that is hardly ever worn?” they’d say. “Why would someone who wants to dedicate his days and nights to learning Torah want to waste money on an extravagant piece of jewelry? Too expensive to leave around the house so it’s placed in the safe. Too bothersome to retrieve for Yom Tov and simchahs so it lingers in the safe. Too ridiculous a tradition to uphold — so let’s just pretend it’s in the safe and use the money for something worthwhile like seforim.”