Such is the power of kavod,Kings and Queens ,Such is the power of kavod
O n Rosh Hashanah we attend a coronation and crown Hashem our King. “Ein melech b’lo am — there is no king without a people.” The meaningfulness of being king increases with the number of subjects the king has. So when we crown the King of Kings we affect the cosmos in a way that nothing else in the universe can.
Yet there is a different coronation of sorts that affects our existence not only in this world but in the World to Come as well. Our Sages teach us that when a person comes to the World of Truth he will be asked several questions. They won’t be multiple choice and guessing won’t help. Besides being asked if we made Torah a real priority how honest our business dealings were and whether we truly yearned for the redemption we will be asked “Himlachta es chavercha alecha b’nachas ruach? Did you make your friend king over you with satisfaction?” (Reishis Chochmah Shaar Hayirah ch. 12)
How and why would I make my friend king over me? If I had a king staying in my home and he told me to set the thermostat at 72 degrees while I his lowly subject want it set at 70 well you know how that turns out. Seriously I can understand that a king’s wishes take priority but why should I relate to my friend or my spouse like that? Aren’t we peers?
Rav Wolbe explains that making a friend king really means asking whether we are giving those we interact with sufficient honor. In every way we would relate to a human king there is a corollary to the way we should relate to our friends and spouses. Rambam in Laws of Kings teaches that the great honor due to a king manifests in our not riding on his horse sitting in his chair or using any of his personal items. We cannot see him unclothed or watch him receive a haircut. And of course we must speak respectfully to the king measuring our words so as not to waste his time. (After all he has a kingdom to run!) We can infer from these halachos that we should be careful with our friends’ privacy property and time; and that we should avoid looking at our friends or spouses when they are in a compromised situation.
