One of the most crucial pre-dating tasks is figuring out what you need
Rachel Burnham with Bassi Gruen
There are many aspects to consider when choosing a spouse. I recommend focusing on the following six:
Emotional Needs: This refers to the core ways we feel loved, supported, and emotionally safe in a relationship — things like validation, trust, and acceptance. They form the foundation for connection and vulnerability.
Everyone needs all of these to some degree. The real question is: Which ones matter most to you? Some people crave verbal affirmation; others need emotional attunement or consistent presence.
You’re not identifying what’s nice; you’re uncovering what’s nonnegotiable. The goal is to pinpoint the emotional needs that are crucial — and those you could live without.
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