Where is that elusive koach I was promised as the gift of this decade?
Ben shloshim la’koach, it says in Pirkei Avos. The thirties are the peak of strength. But I wonder, as the years move on and my thirties march closer to my forties, where is that elusive koach I was promised as the gift of this decade?
I look back to my twenties — getting my degree, getting engaged and married, building a career, and learning to be a wife and mother. In my twenties, I had koach. Now? I’m just tired.
I don’t know how Past Me did it in my twenties, but I suspect she took an advance on the koach of my thirties. She didn’t leave me much. And she was so smug about it, too! “Look at how much I’m juggling, and I still make dinner every night.” She never said it out loud, but I know she felt pretty good about herself.
I look around at my friends now, also in their thirties; we’re all in a similar boat. There’s the constant juggling and prioritizing and re-prioritizing; running to babysitters, carpools, and school plays; approaching the stage of bar and bas mitzvah celebrations; holding responsible positions at our jobs; growing families; sifting through endless piles of homework and mitzvah notes.
Create a free account to keep reading.
