GREAT READS → MUSINGS Issue 857 · April 21, 2021

Pandemonium Planned

I’m never actually present at these alleged family meetings, but given my children’s behavior, I’m 90 percent certain they do take place

Pandemonium Planned

 

Four-year-old: “Hey, guys, I think it’s great that we’ve been able to wake up before 5 a.m., but we can do better than that.”

Three-year-old: “Really? I’m pretty maxed out from getting up at five. By 4:30 in the afternoon, I’m losing my mind.”

Four-year-old: “No, let’s not wake up earlier, let’s just tag-team Mommy. If we plan it well, we can have her awake for most of the night. That way, she doesn’t ever have to miss us!”

Infant: “Sounds like a plan. What if instead of just waking up and eating, I also throw up everywhere?”

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