WELLBEING → FAMILY REFLECTIONS Issue 824 · August 19, 2020

MOVING FORWARD

Instead of being stuck in the past, let go and move on

MOVING FORWARD


“It took me years to get over what my sister said to me. I just couldn’t let it go.”

Shani is like that. When something unpleasant happens, it lands deep inside her, where it sits and festers, growing darker and heavier with the passage of time. But not by itself; Shani actively helps it along.

“Every time I hear her voice, I replay the whole scene in my mind and my blood starts to boil. I can’t look at her without dredging up the whole story.”

Shani’s response is typical of those who’ve survived traumatic events. The sight of the place of the trauma, the smell of the place, sometimes just the mention of the place, all trigger flashbacks of the terrible event. All these cues are the starting point of complex neural pathways fueled by the emotion of terror. They’re seared into the fabric of the brain where they operate without conscious intention or desire.

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