WELLBEING → FAMILY REFLECTIONS Issue 1049 · February 12, 2025

On the Defense

There’s a magic response that stops conflict from escalating

On the Defense

Act 2, Scene 2. At the kitchen table:

Wife (to husband): Whenever you tell me I’m shouting, I immediately lower my voice. When I tell you that you’re shouting, you always deny it.

Husband: That’s not true.

Wife: Well, this morning when I said you were speaking too loudly, you told me you weren’t.

Husband: That’s because I wasn’t.

Wife: And this is what I mean. You almost always tell me that it isn’t true.

Husband: Because it’s not.

If this was a “choose your own ending” story, what option would you choose?

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