Strictly Business: the Conversation Continues

Business as usual? In Issue 897, readers shared their tales of navigating a mixed workplace with the appropriate boundaries and sensitivities. Here, we share a sampling of the responses we received: struggles, questions, and goals

Rabbinical Relationships

I’m writing in response to Rav Avrohom Weinrib, who wrote that he’s seen and heard too many terrible stories about men and women intermingling in frum offices. How does this sensitivity play out as a rabbi of a community with women asking sh’eilos and eitzos or getting hadrachah on personal matters? These topics often include marital harmony or lack thereof, mental health challenges, family situations that warrant guidance or support, or internal questions that need clarity.

When is it the place of the rav to get involved with the women in his community and try to help, and when does he need to create boundaries? Does the rav reach out to offer help or does he just wait until help is requested? Does the rav take initiative to try to be there for a woman or does he try to keep back? If the rav is concerned that his boundary line is breached, does the rav have a responsibility to communicate this to the women or does he just let things be? Does that leave women feeling hurt, alone, or not heard in the process? How would the rav suggest I build a relationship with my community rav in a healthy way?

Name Withheld

Rav Weinrib responds:

Thank you so much for this important and very relevant question.

I believe you are raising two main concerns: First, how can a woman build a connection with her community rav? How can that be accomplished on a practical level? Second, assuming a relationship is formed, what boundaries are necessary to ensure it poses no risk?