Bewildered parents submit their questions
I made the grave, grave mistake of taking my baby upstairs to change him, an activity that took a total of 120 seconds, including travel time. I came back to what I can only describe as utter pandemonium, featuring an indoor carnival complete with marshmallow fluff smeared on the chair I just reupholstered, shaving-cream-covered balloons wobbling drunkenly on the floor, and that stupid flour and pennies game, which was obviously invented by a sadist who hated his mother.
You know what was nowhere to be found? The four rascals who quick-changed my dining room into A Mother’s Worst Nightmare. Does the mother of any one of these children owe me a cleaning lady hour?
It’s a cardinal rule of kid hosting to never, and we repeat never, allow imaginative kids to roam free in your house. You know why parents are “forgetting” their kids in your house, right? It’s because they want a chance to clean.
We love a free-spirited kid (from afar) but for safe playdates, invite the less adventurous kids over instead. Consider yourself warned, though: What you’re losing in heart-stopping crashes and soul-crushing messes, you’re gaining in hearing “I’m bored” on loop.
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