How can trauma affect a marriage, and what can you do about it?
Abby Delouya RMFT-CCC, CPTT
IN recent years, discussions and articles about trauma treatment have become prolific. We’re learning that people suffer from many types of trauma — relational trauma, post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD), complex PTSD, among other trauma- related conditions. Comorbidities (additional occurring conditions) can often be present, such as anxiety, depression, and substance/behavioral addictions.
No man (or woman) is an island, which means that people in the orbit of trauma survivors are also affected by how the trauma plays out. What happens when your spouse is affected by trauma? How can trauma affect a marriage, and what can you do about it?
Trauma manifests in many ways: irritability, insomnia, memory problems, mood swings, fear, withdrawal, numbness, sadness, difficulty concentrating, muscle tension, body aches, fatigue, headaches, and nightmares, among other symptoms.
Sometimes the trauma trigger isn’t easily identified and these symptoms manifest with no warning. Sometimes it’s easy to make the connection between our bodily and emotional reactions and our trauma. There’s capital “T” Trauma — significant and recurring trauma (abuse, neglect, betrayal, war, accidents, etc), and lowercase “t” trauma — smaller difficult situations that haven’t been processed properly, and cause a large emotional burden.
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