E stee feels that vegetables are an important part of every meal. Her dinners always include a selection of several vegetables and her rule is: “You have to eat at least one.” Seven-year-old Dovi hates vegetables. Every night there’s a struggle at the table and this night is no different. “I’m only eating the fish sticks” Dovi announces.
Joseph disagrees with his wife’s philosophy. “I never ate vegetables as a kid and I grew up just fine. I eat plenty of vegetables now. I think children’s tastes develop over time and forcing a child to eat a food he doesn’t like can give him eating disorders or other problems. I don’t think you should be doing this.”
He says this at the table as Dovi is shoving the vegetables away and Estee is shoving them back to him. Estee glares at Joseph stands up stomps off to her room and slams the door. Dovi loses his appetite for the fish sticks.
The family “triangle” is a common phenomenon. It happens because parents earnestly want the best for their children. However in their quest to give them that “best ” adults often inadvertently end up giving their youngsters the worst. The vegetable story illustrates many problematic aspects of family communication:
