She was ahead of her time in her ability to intuit what has taken us so long to understand: life is complex, but it doesn’t have to be complicated.
May 8, 2020 / Pesach Sheini, 14 Iyar, 5780
A
huva — k’shma kach he.
This is the story of a woman who loved and was loved.
Pesach Sheini is a chance for a do-over, an opportunity to reclaim that which we may have missed the first time around. My sister Ahuva a”h returned her pure neshamah to Hashem four weeks ago, on the night of the second Seder. We made that Seder with heavy hearts full of love, faith, and pain. Four weeks later we can talk about and begin to understand the gift that we lost.
Forty-five years ago, in a Detroit hospital, my then 28-year-old mother gave birth to a baby with Down syndrome. This was long before amniocentesis, and my parents were completely shocked and devastated. One day, as my mother lay crying in her hospital bed, a nurse leaned over and whispered, “Send her to an institution and pretend she was never born.” Horrified, my parents named their baby “Ahuva,” meaning Loved, and set out to give her the best life possible.
Doctors told them she’d never read, write, nor be capable of daily tasks. My parents would have none of that. They invested hours teaching her basic life skills, and then some. She learned how to be organized, tidy, and to pack a suitcase (you could bounce a quarter off of her folded shirts). She learned to socialize and be comfortable around others. In fact, she was exceptionally popular.
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