“You can choose power or you can choose influence. But you very rarely can have both”
Rules that cannot be enforced effectively are often pointless. Take, for instance, a hypothetical case in which a teacher demands that students not think about purple elephants during a lesson, to maintain focus. Such a rule is absurd because it’s unenforceable and unobservable, making it inherently ineffective. This might be an exaggerated example, but it illustrates the futility of unenforceable rules.
I recall an incident with a new rebbi at my school that highlights this point. To demonstrate the absurdity of certain rules, I would text him, “Hello, I’m on the plane,” during flights when phone use was prohibited. This was to show that rules without enforcement mechanisms are meaningless. Although he is no longer at our school, I think of him every time I fly, and I often still use that as an opportunity to say hello to an old dear friend. Therefore, when schools attempt to impose regulations outside the school environment, they risk creating rules that seem arbitrary and set the stage for failure.
Instead, schools can focus on imparting values. They can educate parents on their expectations and aspirations for their children, explaining the traits of students who thrive in their environment. This approach is not about setting strong rules but about communicating expectations.
This approach could extend to the interview and screening process for new students, with the hanhalah asking the parents directly if their values align with the school’s ethos. Any rule-making beyond these parameters risks trivializing the concept of rules and detracts from the genuine opportunity to convey values in these critical areas.
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