"How ironic that in an era when so many female employees are supporting their husbands in kollel and the rest need two incomes to get by, women are still assumed to be working just for recreation"
I think it’s time for people to hear the perspective of a boy’s mother regarding the topic of shidduch pictures.
When my oldest son started dating, I, too, gasped at the idea of asking for a picture. It’s a year later and my perspective has completely changed, as did the opinions of many of my friends who have boys in shidduchim.
First, it’s very difficult to assess what a girl is like from a résumé and making phone calls. While a picture doesn’t represent the essence of a girl (her middos, her intellect, etc.), it gives a glimpse of the girl. The girl’s parents meet the boy when he picks her up for the first date, while the boy’s parents don’t usually have that advantage until much later on.
Second, as I’m the only one to view the picture of the girl, I don’t understand how this is a breach of tzniyus in any way. Most mothers don’t pass the picture around (everyone I know is very careful to not circulate girls’ pictures) and are just viewing the picture in lieu of meeting the girl in person. It does help to put a face to a résumé, and honestly, most mothers do look at the résumés with pictures first because it just makes the process easier.
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